Dehydrated potatoes the silent killer.

Is buying liquid soap is just charging me for adding water, or is buying bar soap charging me for taking it out?

Dehydrated potatoes will kill you if snorted. In memory of Billy you earned that 5 dollar bet my friend. Now you'll be betting with angels. Also everyone looked at me funny at the wake for bringing funeral potatoes. Oh I just got that.....

I think that people should be more honest, then at least I would know why I was creeping you out that one day. Was it the camera or the fact that you found me in the crawl space wearing a Franky says relax t-shirt? Because I have other shirts!

I read this saying the other day: "You were born a winner! After all you were the fastest sperm." This was of course coined by a man. Then I thought about what it would say if a woman came up with it, and then all of my failed relationships came into focus. It goes like this: You where sitting there minding your own business when you where assaulted by billions of man particles trying to make you into something you weren't. Now it's pay back time!